Showing posts with label Star Wars. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Star Wars. Show all posts
Friday, February 03, 2012
Trailer for "The Phantom Menace" in 3D manages to make the film seen even worse
This may be the most annoying thing ever created.
As a commenter said:
videovitch
2 February 2012 3:56PM
There are no words in the English language that adequately express the extent to which George Lucas needs to fuck the fuck off.
Friday, October 14, 2011
NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Darth Maul returns in The Clone Wars
Virgin births, resurrections..where does Lucas get his inspiration...?
Monday, September 12, 2011
Friday, September 09, 2011
Thursday, July 07, 2011
Friday, November 26, 2010
Darth Vader's dirty laundry fails to sell at auction
...a rare Darth Vader costume made for Star Wars film The Empire Strikes Back failed to sell [at a Christie's auction].
It had been expected to fetch up to £230,000.
The costume, which was being sold by a private collector from the US who acquired it in 2003, was believed to have been the first complete Vader costume to be offered at auction.
Read more here.
It had been expected to fetch up to £230,000.
The costume, which was being sold by a private collector from the US who acquired it in 2003, was believed to have been the first complete Vader costume to be offered at auction.
Read more here.
Saturday, December 19, 2009
Star Wars: The Phantom Menace Review
A clever and biting review of The Phantom Menace (in 7 parts), though it is marred by the narrator's droning voice and some very juvenile humour (sorry friend, but rape jokes are not funny).
Thursday, December 10, 2009
Why David Lynch Turned Down 'Return of the Jedi'
But then he want on to Dune, and that turned out sooo well...
Friday, April 17, 2009
Force is strong for Jedi police
Eight police officers serving with Scotland's largest force listed their official religion as Jedi in voluntary diversity forms, it has emerged.
Strathclyde Police said the officers and two of its civilian staff claimed to follow the faith, which features in the Star Wars movies...
...The Office for National Statistics did not recognise it as a separate category, and incorporated followers of Jedi with atheists.
My God, isn't that discrimination? They've been humiliated! Call the U.N.!
Read more here.
Strathclyde Police said the officers and two of its civilian staff claimed to follow the faith, which features in the Star Wars movies...
...The Office for National Statistics did not recognise it as a separate category, and incorporated followers of Jedi with atheists.
My God, isn't that discrimination? They've been humiliated! Call the U.N.!
Read more here.
Tuesday, February 03, 2009
Sunday, January 04, 2009
Wednesday, December 24, 2008
Monday, November 17, 2008
Saturday, August 16, 2008
The Clone Wars
The new Star Wars, umm, film "The Clone Wars" has opened to very negative reviews, part of this because this generation is experiencing their "Battlestar Galactica" moment.
In 1978 in response to the original Star War's success, the makers of the original "Battlestar Galactica" television series decided to cash in.
They released, in Canada and Europe but not in the U.S., a *theatrical* version of the show. Only it wasn't really a movie, but 2 episodes stuck back to back and thrown up on the big screen. It wasn't even in widescreen format...
Needless to say, this was noticeable at the time, as one hour long story wrapped up only to have another begin.
This experience (yes I was one of the suckers) soured me on Battlestar for years.
Seems Lucas & Co. have pulled the same stunt on Star Wars fans with "The Clone Wars".
via aintitcool.com:
It takes the premise of an epic, big-screen movie series and downscales everything (the ideas, the special effects, the music, the dramatic stakes) to children's-television size. But then, for whatever reason, Lucas and Warner Bros. decided to project this downscaled version of "Star Wars" back up on a big screen -- and they want you to pay to see it.
Read more here.
The fans who first saw "Star Wars" as children, and are now disillusioned adults have really missed the mark:
I found "Clone Wars" depressing because of the sense of finality it created among the older "Star Wars" fans at my screening: Whatever emotional investment we had in "Star Wars" as the prequels unfolded is absolutely over. "Star Wars" is no longer even trying to be clunky big-budget cinematic mythmaking: It's an episodic TV show that sells toys.
Lucus, Star Wars, the lot, have *always* been a factory for the selling of merchandise...always. In the late 70's, before the release of "The Empire Strikes Back", "Star Wars" was viewed as mainly a kids' film, well made no doubt, but first and foremost a kids' film. Shelves were flooded with Star Wars crap from day one.
So current 30 something fans are realizing for the first time something older viewers knew all along.
He's only in it for the money.
Sucks growing up, doesn't it?
In 1978 in response to the original Star War's success, the makers of the original "Battlestar Galactica" television series decided to cash in.
They released, in Canada and Europe but not in the U.S., a *theatrical* version of the show. Only it wasn't really a movie, but 2 episodes stuck back to back and thrown up on the big screen. It wasn't even in widescreen format...
Needless to say, this was noticeable at the time, as one hour long story wrapped up only to have another begin.
This experience (yes I was one of the suckers) soured me on Battlestar for years.
Seems Lucas & Co. have pulled the same stunt on Star Wars fans with "The Clone Wars".
via aintitcool.com:
It takes the premise of an epic, big-screen movie series and downscales everything (the ideas, the special effects, the music, the dramatic stakes) to children's-television size. But then, for whatever reason, Lucas and Warner Bros. decided to project this downscaled version of "Star Wars" back up on a big screen -- and they want you to pay to see it.
Read more here.
The fans who first saw "Star Wars" as children, and are now disillusioned adults have really missed the mark:
I found "Clone Wars" depressing because of the sense of finality it created among the older "Star Wars" fans at my screening: Whatever emotional investment we had in "Star Wars" as the prequels unfolded is absolutely over. "Star Wars" is no longer even trying to be clunky big-budget cinematic mythmaking: It's an episodic TV show that sells toys.
Lucus, Star Wars, the lot, have *always* been a factory for the selling of merchandise...always. In the late 70's, before the release of "The Empire Strikes Back", "Star Wars" was viewed as mainly a kids' film, well made no doubt, but first and foremost a kids' film. Shelves were flooded with Star Wars crap from day one.
So current 30 something fans are realizing for the first time something older viewers knew all along.
He's only in it for the money.
Sucks growing up, doesn't it?
Wednesday, August 13, 2008
Ziro the Hutt - Lucas tries to out Jar Jar Jar Jar
Seems that the new Star Wars film, besides being dull and uninteresting, also contains Lucas's bid to out Jar Jar Jar Jar.
...the biggest laugh getter was Zero the Hutt. Living in 'downtown Coruscant' (what does that even mean on a planet that is one big city?), Ziro is Jabba's 'uncle' and owns his own club. He's also purple, wears feathers and body paint and talks like Truman Capote as voiced by Eric Cartman...
...“Zero, Jabba’s uncle, originally spoke in Hutt-ese, like Jabba and then he had a different sluggish voice just like Jabba, and then George one day was watching it and said ‘I want him to sound like Truman Capote.’ He actually said that and we were like ‘Wow!’”
Is there a minority Lucas hasn't offended yet?
Read more here.
Monday, March 24, 2008
Sunday, March 23, 2008
Saturday, March 08, 2008
Thursday, March 06, 2008
Star Wars. The Best and Worst
Best Movie
Star Wars
without a doubt. As close as you can get to a perfect movie.
The Empire Strikes Back
The epic becomes well, epic
Revenge of the Sith
and moves from epic to operatic
Attack of the Clones
the move to operatic, with some missteps
Return of the Jedi
made for kids, way too cute
The Phantom Menace
made for idiots, way too dumb
Worst Movie
That's a tough one. I'm torn between "Return of the Jedi", with its Ewoks, bad overdubbing, and Harrison Ford's appalling acting, or "The Phantom Menace" with its poor pacing, dull characters and JarJar Binks. I'm afraid I must go with "The Phantom Menace". A trade dispute? Fart jokes? Whoopee!
Worst Scene
"Revenge of the Sith", Darth Vader's reaction to the news of Padmé's death, a cliched "Noooo!". Awful. Terrible. It made me laugh, not the reaction they'd hoped for I think - Runner up - "Attack of the Clones" Anakin rides the space cows to impress Padmé (this was a contender for Worst SFX). Didn't anyone turn to George and say "You have to be fucking kidding..." No, I guess not.
Best Good guy
Yoda. Rest my case I do.
Worst Good Guy
Other than JarJar? - Qui-Gon Jinn. The man is a slightly unprincipled idiot. Perhaps Lucas knows this and kills him off for it. Face it, the man's choices get them in all sorts of trouble, and he does use a child to raise money and further their cause. Obi Wan learned this lesson well.
Best Villain
Other than Darth?...General Grievous, if only for his fighting skills. On this point, Darth Mull would have to be a close second. Both are disposed of far too quickly. Nod to the Senator/Supreme Chancellor/Emperor as well.
Worst Villain
The Trade Federation. These hand wringing nobodies are Star War's wimpiest villains (See Worst Accent). Even their droid army can't hit shit (see Worst Robot).
Best Babe
"Return of the Jedi". Slave Leia. Not much to choose from really, is there?
Scariest Babe
"The Phantom Menace" Padmé, Queen of the Vampire Women. She's looking at you Anakin.
Best Robot
R2D2. He has attitude, although this was overdone in "Attack of the Clones". Flying indeed. Yeah, I know C-3PO has attitude as well, but he became JarJar's understudy (also see "Attack of the Clones"). Runner up - Jabba the Hutt's TT-8L Gatekeeper Droid. How rude.
Worst Robot
"The Phantom Menace" The Droid Army. Dogfaced clowns who can't hit a thing. Roger roger. Runner up - "Revenge of the Sith" the birthing droids. "She's dying, opps sorrryyy"
Worst SFX
"Return of the Jedi" The Rancor. Matte lines a mile wide (sorta fixed in the Special Editions). This scene does provide the pretense for Star War's only nude scene...
Best Cinematic moment
"Revenge of the Sith" silent (music with no dialog) montage between Anakin and Padmé. Lucas can do it sometimes.
Darkest Moment
"Star Wars" The death of Uncle Owen and Aunt Beru. Nasty. - "Revenge of the Sith" - The killing of the younglings at the Jedi Temple.
Best Minor Character
"Return of the Jedi" General Akbar. It's a Trap! No one can withstand eyes of this magnitude. Runner up "The Empire Strikes Back" Admiral Piett.
Most Annoying Character
Oh gee let me see... The first film's humour was sparse and controlled. By 1999, the part of the annoying sidekick had grown, and Jar Jar is in this tradition. He is also remarkably ill conceived and irritating. Didn't anyone turn to George and say "You have to be fucking kidding..." Oh right, I asked that already. Runner up - "Star Wars". Luke whining about power converters, and those bloody Ewoks (Return of the Jedi)..Leia would be here but she is no longer viewed as a "bitch", in 1977 the most common word used to describe her.
Creepiest Plot Element
The Anakin/Padimai romance, especially the early period (later it just gets unbelievable). Runner up - Luke/Leia, brother/sister. No matter what Lucas claims, "Star Wars" gives no hint of their actually relationship but in fact gives quite the opposite impression..ewww.
Worst Acting
"The Phantom Menace" the kids gathered around Anikan's speeder. Cheap shot I know, knocking kid's acting, sooo - Runner up - "Return of the Jedi" Harrison Ford is awful. "Proper?"
Worst Plot arc
Anakin/Darth Vader. I mean, wtf. Any clear eyed observer would have locked Anakin up early as a dangerous psychotic. The Jedi though keep going on about "The Prophecy", so their eyes are closed. But what's up with Padmé? Didn't she get out much? He just seems to go too far too quickly.
Best Space Battle
Opening of "Revenge of the Sith". The sequence owes something to "Starship Troopers" (which itself owes something to..etc), but on a much larger scale.
Best Land Battle
"Attack of the Clones", The Battle of Geonosis. Very digital but great to watch. Runner up - "The Empire Strikes Back" The Battle of Hoth. Very analog but great to watch.
Best Space Chase
"The Empire Strikes Back" - The Falcon chased through the asteroids. I might be wrong, but it is the first use of camera shake in an SX shot.
Best Ground Chase
"Attack of the Clones*" Chasing the Bounty Hunter. Runner up - Speeder chase from "Return of the Jedi". The race in "The Phantom Menace" is warmed over Nascar but fits comfortably into the IQ range of its target audience.
* thanks to Juice for pointing out an error here.
Best Lightsaber fight
"The Phantom Menace" The Jedi vs. the Sith. The film comes alive for those few moments. Runner up - "The Empire Strikes Back" Luke and Darth's final fight (of this film).
Worst Lightsaber fight
"Star Wars". I know, it looked fine in 1977, but really. Your powers are weak, old man. Parts of this sequence were in the running for Worst SFX.
Most Operatic Moment
"Revenge of the Sith" Mace Windu breaks a window. The Emperor and Yoda's redecoration of the Senate chamber is a contender as well.
Worst Mismatch between old and new
Obi Wan and the droids. He doesn't remember haven't owned any droids? Did he have his memory erased too? (Uncle Owen has a similar memory lapse). Runner up - Leia's memory of her mother. Huh? The Midichlorians rank up high up the list of blunders.
Worst Accent
Our old friends the Trade Federation again. What were they thinking? I know I though of WWII Japanese villains. Honorabre gentremen excuse prease but we are brockading your pranet. Ah so.
Worst Dialog
"Attack of the Clones" Anakin, sand and where it can get to. Ewww. In fact anytime Lucas has his lovers chatting away to each other, it is too painful.
Best Ship
"Attack of the Clones" Senator Amidala's shuttle, the one the gets blow away at the beginning. Neo Deco. Great design.
Worst Ship
Tie Fighters. Look at it, you can't see to the side of you. Not much good in a fight. The Empire's strong point was never design. Two Death Stars blown up? Two? One I can understand.
Worst SciFi moment
"Star Wars" Hans Solo: "I made the Kessel Run in less than 12 parsecs." Say what? Even Obi Wan doesn't get it.
Greatest Rip Off
Just the one? Coruscant. Direct steal from Issac Asimov's Foundation and its city planet Trantor ("Foundation" was heavily mined by Lucas). Parts of "Star Wars" are a bit Dune-ish as well. In the music department, a theme used in "Star Wars" has reminded me of one from "Star Trek" from the first time I heard it.
Recently the publishers of the Bible have threatened to sue Lucas over the virgin birth storyline.
Most Wasted Opportunity
Mace Windu. He sits most of the time, nodding and agreeing with Yoda. He does get to kick some ass, but not enough. Runner up - Count Dooku could have been more, oh I don't know, Transilvanian, also how Bobafett meets his end (although this last may better fit under Worst Mismatch).
Worst case of Lucas's love for Nazi themed imagery
The end of "Star Wars". The Rebels have been watching their Leni Riefenstahl, haven't they? It's a triumph if you will.
Best case of Lucas's love for Nazi themed imagery
Darth Vader in "Star Wars". From the first second you see him, you know he's bad.
Best Special Edition addition
"The Empire Strikes Back" Cloud City. The additions really do add to the story and the film.
Worst Special Edition addition
Guido shoots first. Hands down. Stupid move. Audiences howled with agreement at the original version. There's a reason George, get over it. It's only Guido. Others include the dance number at Jabba the Hutt's ("Return of the Jedi")., followed by Luke, Obi Wan and the droids arrival in Mos Eisley in "Star Wars". An unsuccessful layering of digital and real footage (Jabba's appearance in this film is also not entirely successful, no matter how many times they tried and fix it). Hayden Christensen's substitution at the end of "Return of the Jedi" is mildly disturbing.
Best Surprise
Hans Solo's return at the end of "Star Wars" or Luke's father's actual identity. Shocking!
Star Wars
without a doubt. As close as you can get to a perfect movie.
The Empire Strikes Back
The epic becomes well, epic
Revenge of the Sith
and moves from epic to operatic
Attack of the Clones
the move to operatic, with some missteps
Return of the Jedi
made for kids, way too cute
The Phantom Menace
made for idiots, way too dumb
Worst Movie
That's a tough one. I'm torn between "Return of the Jedi", with its Ewoks, bad overdubbing, and Harrison Ford's appalling acting, or "The Phantom Menace" with its poor pacing, dull characters and JarJar Binks. I'm afraid I must go with "The Phantom Menace". A trade dispute? Fart jokes? Whoopee!
Worst Scene
"Revenge of the Sith", Darth Vader's reaction to the news of Padmé's death, a cliched "Noooo!". Awful. Terrible. It made me laugh, not the reaction they'd hoped for I think - Runner up - "Attack of the Clones" Anakin rides the space cows to impress Padmé (this was a contender for Worst SFX). Didn't anyone turn to George and say "You have to be fucking kidding..." No, I guess not.
Best Good guy
Yoda. Rest my case I do.
Worst Good Guy
Other than JarJar? - Qui-Gon Jinn. The man is a slightly unprincipled idiot. Perhaps Lucas knows this and kills him off for it. Face it, the man's choices get them in all sorts of trouble, and he does use a child to raise money and further their cause. Obi Wan learned this lesson well.
Best Villain
Other than Darth?...General Grievous, if only for his fighting skills. On this point, Darth Mull would have to be a close second. Both are disposed of far too quickly. Nod to the Senator/Supreme Chancellor/Emperor as well.
Worst Villain
The Trade Federation. These hand wringing nobodies are Star War's wimpiest villains (See Worst Accent). Even their droid army can't hit shit (see Worst Robot).
Best Babe
"Return of the Jedi". Slave Leia. Not much to choose from really, is there?
Scariest Babe
"The Phantom Menace" Padmé, Queen of the Vampire Women. She's looking at you Anakin.
Best Robot
R2D2. He has attitude, although this was overdone in "Attack of the Clones". Flying indeed. Yeah, I know C-3PO has attitude as well, but he became JarJar's understudy (also see "Attack of the Clones"). Runner up - Jabba the Hutt's TT-8L Gatekeeper Droid. How rude.
Worst Robot
"The Phantom Menace" The Droid Army. Dogfaced clowns who can't hit a thing. Roger roger. Runner up - "Revenge of the Sith" the birthing droids. "She's dying, opps sorrryyy"
Worst SFX
"Return of the Jedi" The Rancor. Matte lines a mile wide (sorta fixed in the Special Editions). This scene does provide the pretense for Star War's only nude scene...
Best Cinematic moment
"Revenge of the Sith" silent (music with no dialog) montage between Anakin and Padmé. Lucas can do it sometimes.
Darkest Moment
"Star Wars" The death of Uncle Owen and Aunt Beru. Nasty. - "Revenge of the Sith" - The killing of the younglings at the Jedi Temple.
Best Minor Character
"Return of the Jedi" General Akbar. It's a Trap! No one can withstand eyes of this magnitude. Runner up "The Empire Strikes Back" Admiral Piett.
Most Annoying Character
Oh gee let me see... The first film's humour was sparse and controlled. By 1999, the part of the annoying sidekick had grown, and Jar Jar is in this tradition. He is also remarkably ill conceived and irritating. Didn't anyone turn to George and say "You have to be fucking kidding..." Oh right, I asked that already. Runner up - "Star Wars". Luke whining about power converters, and those bloody Ewoks (Return of the Jedi)..Leia would be here but she is no longer viewed as a "bitch", in 1977 the most common word used to describe her.
Creepiest Plot Element
The Anakin/Padimai romance, especially the early period (later it just gets unbelievable). Runner up - Luke/Leia, brother/sister. No matter what Lucas claims, "Star Wars" gives no hint of their actually relationship but in fact gives quite the opposite impression..ewww.
Worst Acting
"The Phantom Menace" the kids gathered around Anikan's speeder. Cheap shot I know, knocking kid's acting, sooo - Runner up - "Return of the Jedi" Harrison Ford is awful. "Proper?"
Worst Plot arc
Anakin/Darth Vader. I mean, wtf. Any clear eyed observer would have locked Anakin up early as a dangerous psychotic. The Jedi though keep going on about "The Prophecy", so their eyes are closed. But what's up with Padmé? Didn't she get out much? He just seems to go too far too quickly.
Best Space Battle
Opening of "Revenge of the Sith". The sequence owes something to "Starship Troopers" (which itself owes something to..etc), but on a much larger scale.
Best Land Battle
"Attack of the Clones", The Battle of Geonosis. Very digital but great to watch. Runner up - "The Empire Strikes Back" The Battle of Hoth. Very analog but great to watch.
Best Space Chase
"The Empire Strikes Back" - The Falcon chased through the asteroids. I might be wrong, but it is the first use of camera shake in an SX shot.
Best Ground Chase
"Attack of the Clones*" Chasing the Bounty Hunter. Runner up - Speeder chase from "Return of the Jedi". The race in "The Phantom Menace" is warmed over Nascar but fits comfortably into the IQ range of its target audience.
* thanks to Juice for pointing out an error here.
Best Lightsaber fight
"The Phantom Menace" The Jedi vs. the Sith. The film comes alive for those few moments. Runner up - "The Empire Strikes Back" Luke and Darth's final fight (of this film).
Worst Lightsaber fight
"Star Wars". I know, it looked fine in 1977, but really. Your powers are weak, old man. Parts of this sequence were in the running for Worst SFX.
Most Operatic Moment
"Revenge of the Sith" Mace Windu breaks a window. The Emperor and Yoda's redecoration of the Senate chamber is a contender as well.
Worst Mismatch between old and new
Obi Wan and the droids. He doesn't remember haven't owned any droids? Did he have his memory erased too? (Uncle Owen has a similar memory lapse). Runner up - Leia's memory of her mother. Huh? The Midichlorians rank up high up the list of blunders.
Worst Accent
Our old friends the Trade Federation again. What were they thinking? I know I though of WWII Japanese villains. Honorabre gentremen excuse prease but we are brockading your pranet. Ah so.
Worst Dialog
"Attack of the Clones" Anakin, sand and where it can get to. Ewww. In fact anytime Lucas has his lovers chatting away to each other, it is too painful.
Best Ship
"Attack of the Clones" Senator Amidala's shuttle, the one the gets blow away at the beginning. Neo Deco. Great design.
Worst Ship
Tie Fighters. Look at it, you can't see to the side of you. Not much good in a fight. The Empire's strong point was never design. Two Death Stars blown up? Two? One I can understand.
Worst SciFi moment
"Star Wars" Hans Solo: "I made the Kessel Run in less than 12 parsecs." Say what? Even Obi Wan doesn't get it.
Greatest Rip Off
Just the one? Coruscant. Direct steal from Issac Asimov's Foundation and its city planet Trantor ("Foundation" was heavily mined by Lucas). Parts of "Star Wars" are a bit Dune-ish as well. In the music department, a theme used in "Star Wars" has reminded me of one from "Star Trek" from the first time I heard it.
Recently the publishers of the Bible have threatened to sue Lucas over the virgin birth storyline.
Most Wasted Opportunity
Mace Windu. He sits most of the time, nodding and agreeing with Yoda. He does get to kick some ass, but not enough. Runner up - Count Dooku could have been more, oh I don't know, Transilvanian, also how Bobafett meets his end (although this last may better fit under Worst Mismatch).
Worst case of Lucas's love for Nazi themed imagery
The end of "Star Wars". The Rebels have been watching their Leni Riefenstahl, haven't they? It's a triumph if you will.
Best case of Lucas's love for Nazi themed imagery
Darth Vader in "Star Wars". From the first second you see him, you know he's bad.
Best Special Edition addition
"The Empire Strikes Back" Cloud City. The additions really do add to the story and the film.
Worst Special Edition addition
Guido shoots first. Hands down. Stupid move. Audiences howled with agreement at the original version. There's a reason George, get over it. It's only Guido. Others include the dance number at Jabba the Hutt's ("Return of the Jedi")., followed by Luke, Obi Wan and the droids arrival in Mos Eisley in "Star Wars". An unsuccessful layering of digital and real footage (Jabba's appearance in this film is also not entirely successful, no matter how many times they tried and fix it). Hayden Christensen's substitution at the end of "Return of the Jedi" is mildly disturbing.
Best Surprise
Hans Solo's return at the end of "Star Wars" or Luke's father's actual identity. Shocking!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
